Mime Time

[alfredo]

To draw the crowds;
breathless, statue-still.
contrasting the moving mass.
Minutes of complete
motionlessness.
At first I thought he
was an dummy umbrella seller
but no, a cane
light and flexible,
and, for tickling the unwary,
a mock fluorescent duster.

Sunless countenance n’
matching moustache.
Short dark black brows
dipping down, sadly;
stuck on a grease painted,
pasty face.
Flashing demonstration;
intermittent movement.
Children awed, captivated.
Baggy suit n’ twitching toffee,
replace the Pied Piper’s flute.

Comical, shoes, oversize.
Feet point left and right
and toes that rise inside.
An all seeing noiseless being.
Expressionless except,
simple sadness.

Commercialism n’ animation intersect
when cane taps slotted box;
money for each photo shot.
Dig deep n’ grateful
for such ….silent animation.

Dedicated to Mark Theodossiou
Chaplin-esk street artist, Queens Mall, Brisbane.

[mfwilkie]

'fredo, I think you might consider drawing this in even tighter:

To draw in crowds,
breathless, statue-still
contrasts the moving masses
with minutes of complete
spent motionless.

Maggie

[Ron Wallace (Scotshawk)]

The contracted 'n' didn't work at all for me. It proved more distracting than enhancing so once again I tread on your voice possibly, but this is how the scene played in my head:



At first I thought he him
was an a dummy umbrella seller
but no,
a cane, light and flexible,
and, for tickling the unwary,
a mock fluorescent duster.
He stood breathless, statue-still
to draw the crowds,
contrasting the moving mass.

Minutes of complete motionlessness,
Comical shoes, oversize
in feet pointsplayed left and right
andwith toes that rise inside,
An all seeing noiseless being.
expressionless except,
simple sadness.
sunless countenance n’
and matching moustache.
Short dark black brows
dipping down, sadly,
stuck on a grease painted,
pasty face.
Flashing demonstration;
intermittent movement.
Children awed, captivated.
Baggy suit n’ and twitching toffee,
replace the Pied Piper’s flute.

Commercialism n’ and animation intersect
when as his cane taps the slotted box;
money for each photo shot.
Dig deep n’ and be grateful
for such ….silent animation.

Dedicated to Mark Theodossiou
Chaplin-esk street artist, Queens Mall, Brisbane.

[mfwilkie]

I like that, Ron!

[alfredo]

Im in your debt Ron i am riding off with this steed:-

At first I thought him
a dummy umbrella seller
but no,
a cane, light and flexible,
and, for tickling the unwary,
a mock fluorescent duster.
He stood breathless, statue-still
to draw the crowds,
contrasting the moving mass.

Minutes motionlessness,
Comical shoes, oversize
in feet splayed left and right
with toes that rise inside,
An all seeing noiseless being.
expressionless except,
sunless countenance n’
and matching moustache.
Short dark black brows
dip down, sadly,
stuck on a grease painted,
pasty face.
Flashing demonstration;
intermittent movement.
Children awed, captivated.
Baggy suit and twitching toffee,
replace the Pied Piper’s flute.

Commercialism and animation intersect
when his cane taps the slotted box;
money for each photo shot.
Dig deep and be grateful
for such ….silent animation.

Dedicated to Mark Theodossiou
Chaplin-esk street artist, Queens Mall, Brisbane.