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abrahamsurefoot Member Posts: 55	Burn Baby Burn Jun 1, 2008 16:48:41 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by abrahamsurefoot on Jun 1, 2008 16:48:41 GMT -5 And so she sloughed off her spinsterhood gilded her clitoris wears tee shirts with lewd inscriptions her father lynx-eyed homilist would have turned in his grave had she not possessed the foresight to have him cremated.

Jonathan Morey Weiss-Namaste47 Board Member We are a group of people, then poets, and finally friends. Posts: 3,944	Burn Baby Burn Jun 1, 2008 20:09:30 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Jonathan Morey Weiss-Namaste47 on Jun 1, 2008 20:09:30 GMT -5 Clever piece..I liked the image of sloughing off spinsterhood, and then a gilded clitoris........foresight indeed! Welcome.
	"Through the door of meditation, the imprisoned Soul-Bird of Omnipresence was released. It spread its wings of joy and flew over infinite space, casting cool peace-shadows on unhappiness-scorched beings. Then the Bird of Heaven remembered its little cage of past habits, and folding its wings, lodged itself again behind the bars or earthliness......" Paramahansa Yogananda"

mfwilkie Admin SITE ADMIN[/b] Posts: 4,644	Burn Baby Burn Jun 1, 2008 20:34:06 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by mfwilkie on Jun 1, 2008 20:34:06 GMT -5 I like the piece, kind of reminds me of Michael Firewalker's work.
	Last Edit: Jun 1, 2008 22:09:07 GMT -5 by mfwilkie

Ron Wallace (Scotshawk) Board Member "Are you sure Hank done it this a way?" Waylon Jennings Posts: 2,697	Burn Baby Burn Jun 1, 2008 23:58:44 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Member Give Gift Back to Top Post by Ron Wallace (Scotshawk) on Jun 1, 2008 23:58:44 GMT -5 I like this voice a lot; there's a solidness in it. The switch in tenses from "sloughed" and "gilded" to "wears" kind of bugs me just a bit, but it's not a wrecker, and welcome to the place. Ron
	"There will come a time when everything seems finished. This will be the beginning." Louis L'Amour

brianedwards Guest	Burn Baby Burn Jun 2, 2008 19:47:05 GMT -5 Quote Select Post Deselect Post Link to Post Back to Top Post by brianedwards on Jun 2, 2008 19:47:05 GMT -5 I like how we start in the middle of something that is then made clear in what follows. B.