REM

[dmtimney]

When did we learn enough
to trust the blind spots-
pass the point where we
can't touch bottom?

We, two inmates
of the same asylum
caught in the chaos
of the one kiss where
everything begins.

Where were we standing
when we whispered our
failures whole again,
acts of penance

before you stood behind me
swept my hair aside to
trace your lips across the same
path the sun has kissed
across my shoulders?

See what you started
when your eyes grabbed me hard
and shook away the last caution,
searched my eyes for something
more, and found it.

Last night I saw you
for the first time, naked;
touched you
tasted you,
painted the salt spice
of your summer skin
in broad copper strokes
that your hands brushed
from my face

and had I but woken
to find your arm draped
across my hips, tendrils
of black silk spilled over
the ivory pillow of my breast

I would have turned
to watch you rest.

[Jarlsbane - Michael Ray Cotner]

Donna-- my love--

This is perhaps one of the best poems you have ever penned... it is lush and gorgeous, full of great imagery and such well conceived lines.. the invitation of love- hesitant and unsure but offered... the feeling of how did we get to this place so unexpected... then is it dream or reality? the answer found in your title...

What I really don't understand is how the poem sat here for over three weeks with not one single comment!! It's much better than that and deserves to be read. And reviewed. I can't believe this was so cryptic that it escaped peoples comprehension although there is much depth and meaning to the poem. Just my two cents, Sis... -Michael

[antman]

Ah, you wench, so provocitive, and sooo sensual.
I love to read love poems. Was reading them this week
as a matter of fact. This one should have been in the book
I read. I love your fourth stanza! I don't care for the ? mark
at it's end I feel it needs to be in the preceeding stanza after;
"failures whole again,"
Okay now that said; I can breathe and read another.

peace and love,
anthony

[Jonathan Morey Weiss-Namaste47]

Have read this several times, Donna and have enjoyed it. I need to read it over a few more times, and then some more to squeeze every drop of meaning from it. Hope you're well.

[bulerias]

What amazing imagery -- the soft silk tendrils over the ivory pillow is a great line!! I don't like the "eyes grabbed me hard" line because I think it takes away from the wonderful next words -- "shook away the last caution." That to me is the crux of this poem, the shedding of caution. Perhaps something like -- "Your eyes shook away the last caution, searching for something more and found it...." Just a suggestion, but this is truly a great poem.

[mfwilkie]

I think bulerius offers a good suggestion, Donna.