The Only Thing You Have To Be

[Laura Stone]

The Only Thing You Have To Be

is yourself;
he says it to me everyday.
You only have to be who you are,
who I am-
myself.

Are you ok with me,
I don’t want to let you down;
let anyone down.
Do you love me?

Myself; be myself.
Are you sure you are ok with me;
I don’t want to disappoint you.
All you have to be is who you are;
be yourself.

But what if you change your mind?
What if you decide you don’t want me;
the only thing you have to be
is yourself.

[LeoVictorBriones (poetremains)]

Laura,

I like the idea of this poem because it is so, so true. But I sure would like to see this in images. Just think of familiar moments that inspire and use what you have as a template to plug in images.

[David Nelson Bradsher]

Hi Laura. I like the conceit of the poem, a very worthy topic, but I agree with Leo that some concrete images would strengthen it exponentially while maintaining the vulnerability of N.

[purplejacket]

1. No matter who you're being, you're being yourself. And you're probably not perfectly consistent - we all aren't. "Earth" is made of clay, loam, sand, gravel, oily shale, solid iron ore... Whatever is appropriate.

2. I got the impression that this piece was more about playing with a way to say a thing - repetition, movement, rhythms. For that reason, maybe you could mould it into a form. I don't know if every poem has to be more show than tell. Maybe you can play with some other things too, like line breaks, spacing, font size. (I am going to whisper "sestina" into a hankie and fold it over 6 times into my pocket.)

3. I was wondering what you might think of playing up the different uses of the word have, slipping in an insinuation that the only thing you "have" is yourself.

[LynnDoiron]

Laura -- I'm with pj's 2. comment above -- You know how big I am on images, but this poem, for me, was more about the mind and thoughts, words between self and self, and seeing, not with images but puzzlements like a catch 22. I like this poem ----> a lot. Not sure it doesn't need some little something, a tweak or a ? ---> or ---> very possibly nothing at all but a few more thoughtful reads by me to let the patterns in this sink in.

[the thing is, i know that you know perfectly well how to write an excellent image-filled poem, therefore, i believe this one is a different kind of child. kudos!]

lynn

[mfwilkie]

Laura,

What if you included the first line in the title?

The Only Thing You Have To Be Is Yourself

And start the poem with the next line.

He says this to me everyday.

Maybe ask a question in the next:

Who is this self he's speaking to?

Maggie

[Ron Buck (halfshell)]

excellent verge poem... thought provoking while maintaining an elegant simplicity. there is also the ebb of turbulence and pathos that makes the work dynamic. I can not fault it at all... and tip my cap. lovely read. tidings, ron.

[Laura Stone]

Oh boy, I am not sure how to respond to the many differing opinions. I do feel that this poem, for me, would lose its integrity (that for which I wrote it to mean) if I dropped images into it. This piece is more about how your mind works, the constant self talk and thoughts and conversations that you have with yourself at any given moment. This piece is more about invoking a cadence of sorts in words, word play, rhythm, and allowing the everflowing stream of the subconscious mind have freedom without the need to birth a form. I do know how to write in images, as I have shown here before, but it was a much different intent for which this piece made itself known to me and for how I wrote it. I am pleased with this piece as it is, for now. Perhaps it might speak to me in a different way at another time, but as it is, is exactly how I intended it to come across. And I feel if you all could hear me read it, it would make even more sense to you...

Thanks for the acknowledgement of this work and for all the very thoughtful comments. I learn a great deal from all of you.
'
Laura