A Pheromone Memory

[Jarlsbane - Michael Ray Cotner]

While I worked today
I caught your scent
on the collar of my shirt,
the place where you kissed my neck
and nuzzled me
and I looked into your eyes,
deep brown wellsprings,
where i drowned
gulping huge breaths of you
slowly sinking
into gentle nothingness
not knowing whether
my soul melded into yours
or if it was the other way around...

not caring as long as
I know you love me

[Jo Lynn Ehnes]

Wish it were better, sucks how heartache can create such beautiful poetry. Thoughts for you


While I worked today
I caught your scent
on the collar of my shirt,
the place where you kissed my neck
and nuzzled me
and I looked into your eyes,(as I looked and I might period here just to give the reader a breath)
deep brown wellsprings,
where i drowned
gulping huge breaths of you(comma)
slowly sinking
into gentle nothingness(maybe a comma here as well)
not knowing whether
my soul melded into yours
or if it was the other way around...(or the other way around)

not caring as long as
I know you love me


Wonder about setting the end up like this

not caring
as long as I know
you love me

Just a thought. Hug for you, my friend.

[MichaelFirewalker]

hi Jarls----really love this whispering heart----how about line eleven reading "gentled into nothingness"?----also, think I would drop the last two lines----they feel unnecessary...

michael